The Australian: The downfall

part one…
part two…

When we got back from Catalina Island, he wanted to spend every single night over at my house. We had messed around a little bit on our vacation but I still wasn’t trying to sleep with him.

The more time we spent alone at my house, the more pushy he was on sex. It was seriously super annoying. He was like a little puppy humping my leg 24/7.

I decide to try and keep us busy, we go out to eat, go for drinks.
I cut his hair and told him to grow a beard. Which looked amazing on him. Like all beards do to men.

Korean BBQ

Whenever we hung out, he would ask me ”when you said this, ‘what did you mean’, ‘when said you that, ‘what did you mean’…there’s a huge difference in getting to know someone and constantly repeating yourself. I felt like I was always explaining myself and then when that wasn’t good enough, I’d have to explain myself farther.

When we weren’t playing 21 questions, we were reminiscing on what we did and where we went. Honestly, it was very frustrating. I wanted to just enjoy out time now.

Why do you want to talk about what we did and said 10 mins ago or what we talked about on skype. We had all this time to talk about that when we weren’t in person, why are we wasting our time on this.

Then he started making comment on my weight.

Listen here, mother fucker, this wasn’t some blind date, you approached me, you saw me in person and asked for my number. You liked what you saw, SORRY, if you thought you could just come in and change me.

That’s when I realized he was just kind of controlling and a real asshole.

One time, I wore this hot pink top to the movies and he said “I don’t think bright colors are for you, they make you look bigger”

Oh, ok, no problem, I gots you.

The next day, I found the brightest green dress I owned, wore it. He said “that actually looks really good on you”. Duh, that’s why I own it.

He would constantly make comments about how HE wasn’t eating and that HE was going to the gym. He would ask me if I was going to the gym also.

When I first met him, I was going to the gym every day. I had lost 20 pounds right before I had met him.

This kind of criticism does the total opposite of what he was trying to do, it made me not want to work out. I don’t feel like I have low self esteem and the hell if I EVER am going to let anyone put me down for the way I look.

I told him I was done talking to him and that if he was looking for some California barbie he could go find her because I wasn’t his to mold. After he said he was going to buy me implants. “Once you lose all your weight, I’ll buy you implants, so, you can have really big boobs”. Uuumm no thank you, I don’t even want implants, when these suckers are gone with the rest of my body fat, that will be a good day!

He still had a couple more days left before he went back and didn’t like where we left things and wanted to take me shopping to make it up to me. I got a few dresses, skirts, shoes and a few other things. I played his little game. If he was going to spoil me, I’d pretend to be the happiest girl and ignore all the rude and hurtful things he would say. I didn’t let the words get to me, I liked to think I have pretty thick skin and I can let that shit bounce off of me. Plus I was now at the point where I wasn’t even listening to him anymore.

Around Christmas, my ex and I started talking again, at first I was going to talk to both of them but I didn’t want to cheapen the relationship I was starting to rebuild with my ex.

The Australian asked me what I wanted to xmas, I said a new laptop. He started looking around for one and said we would go shopping when he came over here after the first of the year.

I started to feel bad for using him when I didn’t even want to see him anymore, I was so over it, I was over him and the thought of him just really pissed me off.

I decided to cut things off with him.

We went out to eat with once or twice when he came back in Feb but he was still being an annoying asshole and still didn’t seem to understand HE was the problem.

In April he was coming out here for the NASCAR with like 5 of his buddies and I wanted to have everything to do with that.

By this time, my ex and I weren’t really working out, there was way too much baggage and I just wasn’t ready to let it go.

So I swallowed my pride and tried to rekindle what the Australian and I may have had. It started off ok, we talked a little bit and when he came out here with his friends, I went out with them. We all got a long and it was a lot of fun, I thought “these were going to be the best 3 weeks of my life”, boy, was I wrong.

Anyone who knows me, knows I have a weakness for tall, bearded, tattoo’d, gingers and one of his friends just happen to be all of that. ARE YOU FUCKING kidding me?! I wanted him so bad. The Australian saw it right away and called me out on it. So I mentioned that maybe ‘we could all have some fun’. He didn’t like that so much.

I didn’t stop trying with his friend. At this point, I was over the Australian, I just wanted to party and have fun. I was a total bitch to him and just enjoying myself. He of course was heartbroken. I wasn’t falling for it but I also had to be sweet in front of his friends so that they wanted to hang out with me and I got invited to go out everytime.

Australian stops inviting me to come out. ‘There was just way too much anger and hurt from the “breakup”‘and he just didn’t want to deal with it but I know it was because he didn’t want me to flirt or hook up with his friend, understandable.

One night my friends and I go out downtown so I text Australian to ask if they’re going to be out. He doesn’t respond, I am pissed. I know where they might be so I tell my friends we should go there. We walk in and I see my ginger. I go and talk to him and he asks me if my Australian knows I am here. SERIOUSLY. So now, I am a fucking stalker, AWESOME! I decide to make the most out of it and made him and his friends buy me and my friends drinks all night, I am pissed, annoying and now being a total bitch to him, there’s no turning back now, you fucked up.

The day of the NASCAR races, I asked him why I hadn’t gotten an invite like he had promised me. He said sorry and to meet him down there at Bubba Gumps. We had food, drinks and more drinks. By 3pm, I was day drunk. Then I started with the emotions that I had buried inside. He tells me “I wish I could have met you before you became so broken” it was the realest, more heartfelt thing he had ever said to me, I knew where he was coming from and it was sweet. I just lose it and start crying.

His friends are freaking out about me being a complete hot mess. They leave and he tries to calms me down. We decide to make the most out of the night and head to another bar up the street.

He had said something along the lines of “my friends were right, you’re just a party girl and not looking to settle down” FIRST of all bitch…we’ve only been partying and drinking. AND let’s please not forget the most important thing of all, you’re married and live in another country. Ugh!

Although at this point, he really was separated and living in his other house, they weren’t working out long before I came around and I am sure I didn’t help.

At this point, I am hurt, drunk and over it. He tries to call his friends to come back. While he’s outside this guy comes over and starts chatting me up. I talk to him and he asks who I am here with, I tell him “that guy you saw me talking to” Australian comes back and almost knocks his fool out.

I tell him what the guy said to me but then his friends call him back so he goes outside and this guy comes back and asks for my number, I say ok. Biggest mistake. Australian sees me and tells me to “fuck off” and wants me to pay for my food, uumm no, I am poor. I calm him down and try to tell him that “he just wanted a haircut” we’re good but he’s super hurt.

When his friends show up they give me $20 and tell me take a cab home. Uuumm no, they end up leaving and I decide to give it some time and make some new friends. The other guy ended up leaving after he called my phone in the middle of all this chaos, idiot.

I feel kind of bad for how we left things and I also want my damn trip to Australian, that I so patiently had been waiting for, so I head up the street to Shannon’s on Pine. As soon as he goes into the bathroom, I wait for him and start in with the I am sorry’s and please forgive me. His friends are pissed, they leave and we go back to my place and go to sleep.

The next few days, I don’t talk to him, I do some thinking and decide this is way too much bullshit to deal with and it just not going to work anymore. There’s way too much damage and I am just over it. We had said our peace and it was time to move on.

The next time he came into town, he invited me to sushi, we use to go every Monday night, I say sure but then remind myself that I just have to let it go, that part of my life is over.

The time after that, he calls me again, this time I don’t answer. He emails me asking if he can get a haircut. I still don’t respond.

This week, he texts me “are we talking yet?” I respond with “have you bought a round trip ticket for me yet?” he says “lol, not yet” then I say “then we’ll talk when you do” he tries to keep it going with “do you know what today it??” I don’t respond because the only think I can think of is that it has to be the day we met a year ago.

part two…
part one…


The Australian: Getting to know each other

Part one…

We talk everyday through email and skype. Since he’s 16 hours ahead of me, we only get to talk when he’s at work. He owns his own business with his partner that he comes out to the U.S. with. They buy and sell boats. Most of the time they’re out here, they’re driving around looking at boats and what not then at the end of the 2-3 weeks, they ship everything over.

I tell him I need new bedding and he sends me some gifts cards.

I bought new sheets, pillows, mattress pad. A few other house hold things and a juicer.

It went so fast, I should have asked for more.

He asks me to find some things to do when we was out here. We decide to go to Catalina Island for 2 nights.

The ferry, leaving Long Beach
Long Beach
getting into Avalon
looking out from the street
our hotel
our view
walking down the street
by the water
view from the top of the hills

looking over Avalon
Catalina Island
pet cemetery
cactus garden

rented a golf cart
cute hotel
driving around town


Marilyn Monroe lived on Catalina Island when she first got married
Had a mini movie about her
pictures in the museum
old pictures

collage I made

We had a lot of fun, one of the best vacations I’ve ever had. We ate good food, drank, met locals. Took a golf cart around the island and got to see the most beautiful places. It was amazing. We went to this botanical garden but in case you were wondering, it was just a bunch of fucking cactus. Not that interesting. Went to the Casino museum, learned about the island and the famous people who lived there or had drama there. Best of all, we got to know each other, I was really starting to fall for him.

part three…

My it all started

Last year around this time, my best friend and I went out one night to get drinks and shoot some pool.

The year has been one hell of a roller coaster so buckle up, it’s a long one.

We decide to go to my favorite spot in Belmont Shore, Shannon’s bay shore. Of course.

We get a couple of drinks and walk over to the pool table. There’s a couple of older guys playing so we start chatting them up. The one guy, pretty cute, comes up to me and tells me “you’re really gorgeous for a bigger girl” if only once, guys could realize that’s not a fucking compliment nor the first time I’ve EVER hear that. FUCK OFF guy. Then I stop, look at him and say “are you Australian?” he says “yes, me and my mate are here for a couple of weeks” points to his older short, goofy looking friend. Uuumm no thank you.

I am talking up this one, trying to flirt and get some drinks. He’s not having it. My friend starts talking to him so I am now I am stuck with one of the seven dwarfs. Thanks friend.

This guy is super into me, laughing at everything and trying his hardest not to hump my leg. He buys us drinks all night but then my friend decides she has to go home to her boyfriend.

I decide to stay and milk this guy for the night, I am sure he’s leaving within the next few days why not make it worth his time. Have some young, cute blonde give him attention for the night.

He asks to take me to dinner the next night and for my number, ok, for sure. We talk about what he does, how often he comes here and when I can get a ticket to Australia.

I am pretty smashed at this point and decide to text this guy who said he was in the area. He was a barber and way finer than this old creepy guy I was talking to. To be honest, I didn’t think he was going to come.

20 mins later, barber cutie texts me that he’s here. SHIT! I tell Australian that my friend just got here and I am going to go say Hi. He asks me if I would like another drink, duh, of course.

Barber guy is cute, tall, build, beard, glasses and shaved head. Italian I think. Loving it. He asks me if I want to go to the store across the street, uummm ok, he smokes, totally deal breaker but maybe I’ll let it slide.

We come back to Shannon’s and we’re outside talking and laughing. He tells me that he’s going to barber school and I mention that I want to be a barber as well. Tell me I should come check out his school tomorrow. Probably not going to happen because I am going to be sleeping off this hangover all day.

All of a sudden, I see this little grinning dwarf coming up to me, oh shit, it’s the Australian. I ignore him, he’s so much more awful in good lighting. He’s just posted there, are you fucking kidding me? Bye. He’s like “Shannon, I got you a drink” ummm really, thirsty ass. “ok, thanks, I am kind of busy, I’ll be in in a little bit” at this point you would have thought that he would have been like ‘fuck this bitch’. Nope.

Barber says “how are you getting home” “I don’t know but you can take me” He agrees and says “you have a drink waiting for you though” “that’s true, can’t pass up a free drink” I go and find my free drink, chat him up a little bit, carry the drink back to the barber. Turn around and stupid Australian is on my nuts. I see he’s not that easy to shake off, no worries. Tell barber that I have to go to the bathroom and then I’ll be back. Talk to Australian. He starts questioning me about this guy and I tell him I just met him and I am free to talk to whoever I want since I had just met him also. Got me fucked up. I tell him I am leaving and to have a good night, it’s been real. Although, come to think of it, maybe I didn’t tell him I was leaving because when he called me the next day, he I had ‘ditched him for bearded guy’ uumm yea duh, did you see him??

I forgot I had borrowed my friends shoes and my shoes were at her house as well as my charger. I asked him to drive me over there. She’s not answering her phone so I knock on the door and yell in the window, her BF tries to wake her up but she’s out cold. He’s pissed, I am like sorry I just need my charger and my shoes. The next day she tells me he was pissed because even though I thought it was 11pm, it was closer to 3am, haha ooppsss.

Barber comes over, we make out then it hits me, I am about to be sick, kick him out, go to the bathroom and pass out.

The next day, the Australian calls me, completely forgot I had gave him my number. He asks me if I would like to go out for coffee or dinner when I got off, I said maybe. He texts me throughout the night and at 10pm that night when I had gotten off work, he asked if I wanted to get coffee. No! What?! I am going to bed.

The next day he calls again and asks if he can take me out for dinner, sure why not. I don’t really remember what he looks but I remember thinking he was rather unfortunate. He asks what I am in the mood for, sushi, like always. He said he’s in the mood for Lobster. WOW, my favorite. I find the most expensive place over looking the water. If this is the first and last time I get to eat fancy, it’s going to be where I’ll probably never go again.

We end up going to Parker’s lighthouse. It was super nice and romantic.

our view from the table
Cool fire pit outside

The lobster was so good, could have gotten 3 more, haha. We had wine and dessert as well. He was funny and goofy and starting to grow on me. He wasn’t too bad. He says he’s going back to Australian in 3 days so we wants to spend as much time with me as he can then he’ll be back in 3 weeks or so.

We decide to go to the Queen Mary for the Halloween event, Dark Harbor but then I remember that I don’t like haunted anything so we go to the bar and have a few drinks then walk around the ship. We’re standing outside, over looking the Dark Harbor area. It was for sure not something I was ready for. Pass.

The next day I am telling my friend and she goes, “he’s probably married” I was like “oh, shit, didn’t even think to ask that”.

We go out for lunch at King’s Fish House in downtown Long Beach, it was ok. I asked him what his martial status is and he says “I am separated. I have 3 houses and I’ve been living in one for the last year.”

He tells me he has 2 kids, 17 and 21. I ask what his last name is and internet stalk him when I get home.

Find out, he’s still married and she was out here a week before we met.

He calls me the next day when he’s at the airport and I ask him who she is and he comes clean. I was like “ok, well I don’t know about this”.

When he lands, we talk and I am still up in air about it but let’s be real. He lives in another country, at this point, I have to decide if I want to have some lavish life and be a secret.

Uuummmm yes please, sign me up. I’ve never been to Australia before.

I tell him, we can get to know each other and spend time together but I don’t sleep with married men.

part two..
part three..

When trannies try and fight you while you’re on a date

I started talking to this guy after a mutual match on tinder, of course and it seemed like we hit it off within the first couple of sentences. I was about to go to MN to visit family and friends for the week so didn’t have time to meet up. He asked if we could met up when I got back.

During the week I was there, he had messaged me to tell me he was deleting his account and to text him. I did and it didn’t really go pass the ‘hi, how’s your day going”. Annoying. I figured he was being polite because I was on vacation.

As soon as I got back, I text him and say we should get together sometime. We spend the rest of the night texting. Sharing youtube links and life stories. It was going really well.

The next day we text a bit and I find out we live like 2 blocks away from each other. He’s being a typical male and NOT getting the hints I am dropping so I call him and am like “ssssoooo there’s a bar on the corner we should met up there”.  He says “tonight?” yyeeaaa unless you want to be penpals.

I hate wasting my time. I like you. You like me. We live in walking distance to each other. This could be a beautiful thing.

When I was in MN, my sister did my nails. It was the first time I’ve had fake nails in 10 years or so, I was loving them! As I am getting dressed, my thumb nail flies off, still to this day, I haven’t found it. He texts me and says he’s there, SHIT! I say ‘fuck it’ and head out. I am trying to take a picture of my nail to show my sister that her shit is whack and it didn’t even stay on for a week, lol. So there I am  taking a picture and the flash goes off, I look up and he’s standing at the corner of my street. SHIT. So embarrassing. Why, I have no idea, just felt like he seen me take some random picture of my hand in the dark, no big deal.

Anyways, I tell him what I was doing and now he’s kind of creeped out and wondering why I felt like I had to tell him this, great start to this date, haha.

He’s tall, 6’2″, bearded, of course. Slicked back hair and wearing a long sleeve flannel. It’s hot as shit, why?! He has a nice smile and little baby dimples. It’s over, I’ve fallen.

We have 2 drinks and decide to go check out another bar up the street. We go to Fern’s on 4th street in Long Beach. It’s more our style, dive bar, punk rock, smells of beer and lost dreams.

There’s karaoke going on and I want to sing. I find a song, ‘Spiderwebs’ by No Doubt. He refuses to sing. I look to my right and I see this tall blonde with the amount of plastic surgery you only see on a Beverly Hills house wife. I ask him “how much plastic surgery do you think she’s had” he say “4” that’s sweet. Then he goes “do you think that’s a guy though?” “uummm omg YES, well that makes more sense, get it girl”. Plus that wig was on point, I wanted to ask where she got it.

It’s my turn to sing, I go up there and he can’t see me from where he is and doesn’t come over to watch me, uumm that’s cool.

The next day I looked at his FB page. He posted a status update about proposing in barns and grassy field and that they need to be original..uummm ok, what?! What conversion were you having and why did you feel like you had to post that while I was singing instead of watching me. DICK!

When I come back, I was like “did you stay sitting here the whole time?” He’s like “No, I stood up and walked over to watch you but didn’t want to leave your purse there” uumm cool, thanks.

All of a sudden ‘plastic surgery’ taps him on the arm and says “excuse me, is that your friend” talking about me of course. He’s like “yes I guess” (I guess, WOW, ok) so she says “excuse me, what size are you” uummm “what?!” repeats herself. I say “I don’t understand the question, so I am not answering it”

She’s sitting with a couple, can’t tell if they know each other or not but they’ve been talking all night and doing shots together so who knows.

A couple minutes later, she says “is that your type” points to the guy she’s with “uumm I mean, I am with him” points to the guy I am with “so no thanks” she says “well they’re MARRIED” uumm WOW ok, what? Where is this coming from. I say “congratu-fucking-lations, no one fucking cares” seriously. Who does that?

Since we’re at the end of the bar, on the corner and they’re on the other side of the corner, there’s not much else to look at. I may have been looking at them but only because I was trying to figure out if they knew each other or this drunk bitch was just making her rounds.

10 mins later, she brings the guy over to us and says “I want to introduce you to my friend” I am annoyed and pissed at this point. I have no idea why she’s calling me out or trying to start shit with me and this random couple. Plus this is a first date, so fuck off!

I say “uumm like I told you 10 mins ago, I am not fucking interested'” and shoo her away. She retorts with “whatever, you’re fat and ugly anyways” “uumm probably not” the only other thing I can think of to why she’s starting shit with me is that I was the only other blonde there and she wasn’t having that.

My date says “did you want to leave?” I was like “naw, I am not uncomfortable and we’re enjoying our time and to be honest, I am kind of interested in how this plays out” he’s goes”so we’re for sure that’s a man cuz if he hits you, I am laying him out” first off, Ray Rice….he identifies with being a female…sooo I am say “haha uummm well thanks but I don’t think it works that way”

I feel kind of bad for being dismissive so I go over to the couple and say “I wasn’t trying to be rude, I just don’t know what the hell is going on here” the girl is like “yea, I am confused, we just met her, all I know is her name is ‘Jennifer'” with air quotes and everything. So Jennifer says ‘excuse me, if you have something to say, say it to my face” “first of all bitch, no one was talking to you or about you so you don’t you mind your own fucking business like you should have been all night” ugh, seriously?! what is her problem. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am a nice person, I am never conversational, I usually just smile and ignore them but that didn’t work the first 3 times she tried to get our attention.

I say “you know what, you’re drunk, obviously, so whatever” she starts making faces and noises as to be like ‘no, I am well aware of what’s going on’ so I say “no?! oh ok you’re just a bitch, oh ok, I wasn’t sure”

The couple ends up leaving and the tranny goes and sits across from the bar and flicks us off the rest of the night.

Last week, I am driving around looking for parking and I see her trying to cross the street, I roll my window down and yell at her “BITCH”. I am thinking she goes to the bar every thurs..I might just have to go say ‘HI’.

So we end up leaving and he walks me home. He gives me a kiss then we start making out. We’re both super sauced and feeling good. He says “I am secretly hoping this night doesn’t end, is that weird?” I am like “no, I feel the same way, you’re more than welcome to come up and watch tv or whatever.”

I turn on the TV and we’re talking, then start making out and dry humping like 16 year old well maybe like 12 year old now a days.

He goes “do you have condoms” uuummmm eeeerrrrr..NO..we just met, get outta here. He’s like “that’s ok, I respect that, I respect you even more” cool thanks.

It gets pretty intense, I super like him, I want to so bad but I control myself. We stop making out and just lay there and he pulls me close, we’re cuddling and we start to fall asleep. I tell him he can spend the night if he wants since he lives so close. He kisses me on the forehead and says “ok, yea, thanks. I like you a lot Shannon”. The next morning, he gets up and get up to walk him out and he says “it’s ok, get some sleep, I had fun last night, thanks for letting spend the night. Text me later” Kisses my forehead again and says again “I really like you, Shannon”

I text him around noon and ask if he wants to get lunch, he says maybe. Texts me an hour later and says he has a bunch of deadlines and I should just go ahead and eat. I say “no worries, maybe tonight, I’ll make some food and we can watch a movie, I should be off like 8pm”. He says “yes :)”

At about 6pm, he texts me saying he has some family plans he completely forgot about that also requires an early morning (uumm ok, wasn’t going to ask you to come over after or tomorrow morning sssoo…chill) tell him “ok, have fun” I don’t hear from him the next day so I call him and he says he’s with his sister and says he’ll be back tomorrow and to text him later ‘we could go grab a drink or something’

I text him the next evening and I get no response. A week goes by and I haven’t heard from him so I decide to try and get some answers. I text him saying “so I am confused, I thought we totally got along and really hit it off. You haven’t said anything along the lines of not interested, besides not responding to me..ssooo..I guess I’ll just come out and ask..did you want to see me again?” he says “of course!” wwwhhhhattttt, what?!?! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK! Of course, oooffff course….what?! I say “well maybe you could work on texting me first to let me know I am not the only one actually interested” he goes on about work being busy and having dental work done. I say “I understand how it is, just let me know when you have time” he says “I did have fun though” I don’t respond.

The next day I ask “how are you feeling, what kind of dental work did you have done” no reply. Fuck this guy. Ugh, why can’t people just say what they mean and mean what they say.

I could have been fine with “had a great time, I’ll call you sometime” at least I know that universal for “yea, you’re cool but I am not really feeling this”

The life of a tinder’er..

I had taken a break from online for a few months and still have a few dates I haven’t posted yet but I’ll come back to those.

Everyone has been talking about this new app for dating called ‘tinder’ I signed up with it about the same time last year, went on one date. It went well but then decided I didn’t want to date at all anymore, so I deleted it after a month.

I decided to give it a try again. At first I was just interested in looking at all the pictures and play the game of “hot or not” because let’s be real, that’s all this app is.

Tinder is an app you can download on your smart phone and it gives you the option to link it up to your facebook but it only shows your first name and your interests (‘liked’ pages on FB). You swipe right if you like someone and swipe left if it’s a ‘no’. It shows you matches in your area, which is nice because when you travel, it just picks up people in that area, so it’s like a whole new batch of men. You can choose from 1-100 miles and ages 18-100. Other than that, the picks are at random. After 100 ‘no’ you swipe right and it’s a mutual match, out of 50 matches, I got messaged about 10 times and went on 5 dates. Which in the end makes me feel like guys are just swiping ‘yes’ to every females and seeing who’s a ‘mutual match’.

I would keep the mutual matches for about 2-3 days and if they didnt say anything, I would ‘unmatch’ them. I don’t feel like playing games. Either you’re serious about dating or you’re looking for a hookup. If you want to take me out, you court me. I have no reason to message you. Although, I did try and message a few guys, only got a response twice.

I had my tinder for about a month again. When you feel like you’re saying no more than yes, it’s time to rethink you’re dating sources.

I may have gone on a date with a homeless man..

By now, you can probably tell I have a thing for men with beards. I don’t know where or why this started but I love them. The more bearded, the better.


This totally looking surfer guy with a massive, beautiful beard hits me up one night and he tells me he lives near San Diego but is painting a friends condo in Santa Monica and I should come over. I would but I only go out on dates like to go out for drinks, maybe dinner first. Plus I had to work the next day so thanks but no thanks.


We talk again and I decide to drive out to Santa Monica because I’ve never really hung out anywhere besides the pier area and it could be fun.


I make sure that we’re going to go out and not just kicked at his friends condo. He says yes but I am still nervous.


I get out to Santa Monica and it’s an area I’ve never been to, lots of shops and restaurants.


He said he had just got a beer at this place called “Father’s office” cute name.


I can’t find it because I was going the wrong way, even though he told me the right way to go, I was nervous and completely confused.


I see this skinny bearded man walking towards me in a over sized flannel, cargo shorts and sandals. First thing I thought was “great beard”, 2nd thought was “he’s probably homeless”. That’s when he starts waving at me and jumping up and down. Uuuummmm what?! Are you serious right now?!


Now, don’t get me wrong, beards can make you look homeless and unkempt but at least try and look nice when going out on a date so I don’t mistake you for some cute homeless guy. Also I dated a guy who looked this way maybe even a little more homeless so I can’t really judge, it’s kind of my type lol


I walk up to him and he hugs me and he smells freshly showered so at least there’s that. He’s wearing a hat and I can tell he just decided to just let his hair and beard grow and just see what happens. No maintenance here.


We walk back to the bar and people are staring hardcore. I love it. I, of course, am dressed up and he, well, we know what he was wearing. I wish I could have heard some of the thought or whispers, it would have been fun. Like “are they together?” “Is he following her” “Is this an internet date”


We get to the bar and he grabs his beer, which he just left by the front door. Orders me one and some food and start talking. He tells me that he use to have an apartment in San Deigo but decided to give it to his friend and his GF because they have a kid. Plus I guess he had work up this way for a few weeks and it just worked out.


When we talked the day before and I asked where he lived and he said his car, tent or where ever, I thought he was joking because he just seemed like a typical surfer, goofy personality. I guess he was serious.


He talked just like surfer guys you see in movies and it was kind of funny. He was super nice and sweet and just had a really good, outgoing personality. He had beautiful, nice smile. A cute little nose with freckles. His shirt was unbuttoned just enough that it just kind of hung off of him. You could see his super tan chest and muscles but he was also so thin that I thought “I could break this fool”. He also had a lot of wrinkles around the eyes, which made me think he might be older than he said he was but it was probably because he surfed every day.


We decide to go to the next bar and this one was a little more high end, people were staring and talking but I didn’t care, I really kind of liked this guy. He was fun and didn’t care if people looked or maybe he didn’t even notice, haha.


He paid for drinks and food all night so he couldn’t be too homeless but technically he was probably more of just a couch surfer.


He started talking to a random table and I went to the bathroom, I came back and he just starting talking to other people. He was fun. We got another round of drinks and at this point, I didn’t think I should drive back to Long Beach.


We decided to go back to his friends condo to talk and I could sober up some. We get back and it looks like no one has lived there in awhile, everything was dusty and moved to the center of the room. It smelled like paint so much. We decided to go out on the patio and have a drink.


He tells me that the person who lived here died and the family asked to have it repainted and were coming to back up the rest of the stuff later, it was very weird.


We’re out on the patio and it’s such a nice night and if you looked down, you could see the swimming pool. We start making out and all I could think is “so I am making out with a homeless man, at least I didn’t pick him up on the side of the road”.


We go into the bedroom and there’s a single tempurpedic like bed and he says I can sleep there and he’ll sleep on the floor. The next thing I know it’s 7am and I am freezing. I decide to leave and we kiss.


Yep, he’s still cute.


We talked a few more times after but we didnt have aligning schedules so we didn’t end up hanging out again. I’ll just never forget the night I went out  with a cute homeless man.